Death and Life.

This October, my thoughts and meditations have turned to death and life. Fall is an appropriate time for this contemplation as the season begins to start the illusion of death for many things such as trees, plants and certain bugs...hehe :).

I recently visited my last living (on this plane) Grandmother Becky aka Memaw. She is 90 and recently suffering ill health such that her sons (my uncles) and her daughter (my Mom) have decided that hospice is the best course for her now. She is somewhat in agreement.

I visited her after not seeing her for a few months (we live with some distance between us) and her appearance had increased in frailty, including a more stooped position in a wheelchair, bruises and tears to her skin, hair whiter than white, significantly reduced weight on a person who was always slight of frame. However, her glass blue eyes, when she locked into mine, were vibrant, knowing, and timeless.

We said many things during our visit. She was able to tell me from my identical twin sister with absolutely no problem (she has never had difficulty with this through our years together as have other family members...a gift that belonges magically to her alone). As we were getting ready to leave I said, "Memaw, please be sure to eat more...you know, eating and drinking keeps the spirit attached to the skeleton!' and she replied "I'm not hungry anymore Chanda". The words, along with her very clear eyed steady gaze carried with them weight and meaning. It was sobering.

Many of us...I would bet most of us...live our lives daily without thinking about passing from this plane to the next (death as we know it). I believe this is somewhat of a protective mechanism. Being able to live in the moment and not contemplate death all of the time mobilizes us into action that is needed to live this life. So it's a good thing. And yet according to many wise beings before us, abhinivesha or attachment to life is one cause of our suffering. Abhinivesha is one of the klesha's that we work to overcome - attachement to life. Another way to think of this is: a fear of death.

Certainly when I look into my Grandmother's eyes and it's understood that she is very close to passing away from this life I feel closer to my own mortatily than usual. This knowledge can feel very scary! And it can bring up anxiety as my mind rushes to imagine not seeing my children complete growing up, missing being around my loved family and friends, not seeing my beloved pets, etc.!

One way to overcome abhinivesha is to live fully now...in the present! It is most helpful remembering we are alive now. It is a gift each day to be here, to offer love through friendship, smiles, kindness, generosity (just to list a few) and to offer these qualities of life freely... as freely as able. Enjoying each moment, doing our best to create these moments, doing our best to let go of those moments that do not add up to love (and all the attributes that fall under love), etc. Live your best life today and each day.

Also, what helps is to remember that death, for many, is truly just a way to begin again. To be born again... like the tree that loses leaves for the winter. Like the plants that die, yet the root lives only to be born again in spring. Sitting with the knowledge that death is inevitable without fear, being okay with the sadness of it, and letting that knowledge propel us forward on our journey to live well.

Visiting my Grandmother allows me to sit with all of the season's I have now lived through with and without her, to remember...fun and loving memories and maybe even some learning memories (not so fun). To be grateful for those times. And then to move forward from there - grateful for today and living with hope for bright future days. Not only my yoga practice but, I believe, more importantly our mindfulness practices help us find the peace and calm within knowing we live and die. And this helps us understand how to live more fully. These practices include Yoga, Yin, Meditation and Qigong.

Let It Be offers many classes that help guide us in mindfulness and presence. We look forward to practicing with you.

here is a resource on the Klesha's if you are interested in knowing more: https://www.yogabasics.com/learn/the-cause-of-suffering-the-kleshas/#